About offsites and corporate events

Nothing to win but a lot to (potentially) lose

Offsite and similar gatherings are one of the most interesting social experiments that you can experience in the corporate world. In big corporations, people from different places around the world meet in person to share plans, ideas, projects (or for any other reason bosses think is worth gathering together) and, specially since the pandemic, there is an overexciting atmosphere to chat with colleagues that you have not seen in person for years, have fun and...drink.

Just don't, just in case... don't drink. Nothing to win, a lot to lose

Some real situations

I remember one, some years ago, a person started to get emotional after 5 vodkas and started crying and complaining that the corporation had been extremely unfair to him. Everybody started to look, ask what was happening and at the end some colleagues helped him to bed. Not to mention to mention that 2 vodkas before all the crying he tried to hit on another younger colleague, not cool. Next day everybody started to ask him if he was ok… in reality they were really wondering how bad the hangover (and shame) was, not cool.

Also, you can get out, have a few laughs with your colleagues, drink a bit but… BE ON TIME THE NEXT DAY. Most of the senior managers that are in charge of these events know people will party, actually is part of the plan, but being late is disrespectful. These managers also tend to go to bed early (thankfully, so they dont see all the crazy that happens), so be careful.

These situations get you closer to unemployment that any bad project you manage

On the other hand, you don’t want to be the weird guy that sits in a corner looking very busy and does not socialise with the rest of the team. Finding the sweet spot is usually the safest option in this events. There is no need to be the coolest person but nor just being by yourself all the time is not a good option either. Partying requires practice, so go get some…

Show some interest

Depending on the context, at least 50% of the audience in corporate events don't understand or care about most of what is being shared (source: we have been to many offsites). If this is your case, don’t forget to pretend you do. Most of the presentations will be delivered by people that play a certain role in the organisation, usually a relevant one, specially for their bosses (aka organisers). Doing some email is acceptable, maybe even some newspapers, but don’t look disconnected. A couple of questions from time to time always enhances the idea that you care and your colleagues presenting will thank you.

Anyhow, chances are that most of it gets forgotten within a few weeks. Only chance for not happening is if there is some hard KPIs and commitments (e.g., sales) being put on the table, everything else is just smoke…

Smile, nod and agree. A little bit of clapping, couple of beers, some pictures yelling “one team” and back home! Next year’s offsite will be better for sure…and probably you’ll discuss the same things again.

Stay safe and don’t cross any red line